Forever a Counselor in Training

Finalizing my final semester of graduate studies: Check
A full year of internship completed: Check
Attending my first All Ohio Counseling Conference: Check
Presenting at a Professional Conference: Check

Late last year while I was attending my first professional conference I experienced many things. I was overwhelmed that I was in a place with so many different people who wanted to help other just like I did. I was a bit nervous thinking about so many people with years more of experience in the field. I was excited about the knowledge and connections I would have the opportunity to make. Not to mention the opportunity to buy some pretty awesome tools and toys to use in sessions (why yes I am talking about my deck of feeling playing cards). But there was something that I was not prepared for when I walked into the conference, I was not prepared for... the negativity.

As a graduate student I walked into that conference bright eyed and bushy tailed much like a kid in a candy store. I was hungry to learn new interventions and expand my knowledge about people groups I could be helping. Yet, I was met with jaded people who sat in sessions because they had to fulfill so many continuing education hours, who talked through out the entire presentation to their friend next to them with snide comments or someone who brought their computer to the session "to take notes" but really was shopping online and did not look up from their screen once. As a counselor in training I was astounded by how many working professionals had lost their excitement for learning in order to better serve their students, clients or groups.

I finish my masters degree in a little over one week (EEEKK!) and as exciting as that is I cannot help but notice all of the things that are more bitter than sweet that I will be leaving behind.

1. My Campus

I did not go to the University of Cincinnati for my undergraduate degree so when I stepped foot on campus those first few weeks I felt like a total outsider. I had no idea where I was going, completely intimidated by the rec and did not spend any extra time I had to on campus. Since then I have fallen in love with the uniqueness of the campus, the hammock community in Sigma Sigma commons, the hustle of the rec and the beauty of McMicken on those picture perfect days. Of course there are things I won't miss like the wind tunnels and the constant pestering walking down main street but man I have come to love this place

2. My Cohort

Guys this group of 35 people have been my life line for the past two years. We have laughed together, cried together, supported each other, fought with one another and work so incredibly hard together. It hasn't been easy and there have been times where we haven't gotten along, but we were all working towards the same goal... A Master's Degree. The cohort system is not like anything else in higher education. These people become your school family, there's a school mom and dad. You gain a school spouse, sister, brother and even the weird extended family members like a goofy uncle you admire from a far.

3. My Professors

These are the people I look up to in my field, the people I cried to when a client said mean things to me and no one else would understand, the people who believed in me enough to push me, the people I had to let down when I chose to move away, the people I cursed at late in the night when I procrastinated on an assignment, these are my people. Professors in graduate studies become your colleagues, they begin to ask you questions that make you think about yourself and your knowledge differently. Somehow over the past two years these incredibly accomplish professionals have become people who look to me for innovative ideas about our field.



4. My Internship

My first clinical experience taught me a whole new set of skills, how not to cry (in the moment) when you hear a story that you just can't believe, how to stay strong when a parent is yelling at you, how to empathize with someone so completely different from you, and how to manage a caseload. I not only had my first caseload of clients but I also had my first place of employment as a working clinical counselor in training. I was looked at as a professional, loved by the staff, tried by my clients on a daily basis. Saying goodbye to them has been more difficult than I thought, the work is difficult and the expectations are high but the support and love that has been shared is unmatched.

Closing a chapter in your life such as completing a degree, moving across the country to start a job all sound exciting but honestly it's really tough. Saying goodbye to two of the most formative years of my life yet have me feeling all sorts of feelings. The people, the experiences, the places have all become so important to me and after next week everything will change. My title as counselor in training will come to an end but what I have learned and always hold close to my heart is that we should strive to always be a counselor in training, forever and always a lifetime learner.